your expectation for me to always be there is not gonna make me be there for you. it'll just make me want to stay away from you. the more you want to 'cling' on to me, the more i will repel you. it's just my nature to go against what you want. but i guess you just dont know me well enough. you may mean a lot to me, but it doesnt mean i'll give you everything i have, because i still have a social life outside you. i have other commitments. yes. i may not be committed to church and all, but it doesnt mean i'm not trying. i'm putting in an effort to be closer to God in my walk. and maybe you should too. i mean. stop running away from your problems.

i just hope you can see where i'm coming from. i'm not gonna be always there to feed you with whatever you think you need. you are 21 this year. you are no longer a kid. we're graduating from poly this year. it's not like this is our first year in poly, where we need to adjust to things. you still need to learn things. what's gonna happen when you go overseas and face the world outside? being like this aint gonna get you anywhere.

it's alright to meet up once in a while. but dont be so dependent on anyone. what if i die? you're just gonna jump to someone else. and the cycle continues. what's the point in that? sigh. i wish you'll learn.

actually quite annoyed at the way you handle things. and how you always want things your way. it's like everyone's wrong in your eyes. your stubbornness just makes me wanna slap you at times. ohwells.

other than that, i miss you. i really miss the old you quite badly. i miss the times that we could talk about anything, do stupid things and just be ourselves. let time pass with each others' company. oh the love of those times. whether we make a lot of noise, or just the silence was just good. the company was really good. ohwells. before you fall any deeper, please pick yourself up.

-

hello you. you have been awesome and a blessing in my life. now that you're gone, i'll really miss you and laughing at you about all your size and all. they may be intentional, but you know they are always for jokes. like how i can just be cool with all those nonsense posted on my twitter/facebook. during the editing period, i had a lot of fun. true that i had to travel a lot. lose sleep and what not, but it was worth it knowing the appreciation. even without that, i would it would have been something i wouldnt mind doing. ohwells. i hope you have a good time.