i'm almost willing to do anything for my mg friends. they are the best blessings i've ever gotten from God, and i'm really thankful that they have been there for me no matter what. but there are things that i cant share with them, not because they will judge me, but because they know what's good for me, yet i still do these things once in a while.

so yesterday, diane left. and it wasnt a really happy thing. we might have had a little gathering, but diane's gonna be gone till dec. that's 10months. and in between, more people are leaving. the past two weeks, i've met her like. wow. 3 times. and during those times, i've been traveling all over to meet people, even if it's rush and out of the way for me, i would still do it. and meeting all these girls again just let me know how much i miss all of them, and all the nonsense we did together. i keep telling myself that i dont wanna go overseas no matter what, not because i believe that singapore is home and all that bullshit, but because all my friends are here. i dont want to risk any chance of not being able to meet anyone, because i'm not in singapore. that totally sucks.

ahwells. that aside, i'm ready to actually delete every single memory i have in poly. graduating in two weeks? yeah. i guess. then i might just press delete to the folder that says np. and that will delete all the memories i have with probably everyone in np. whether or not you went to sarawak, wuhan, project groups and what not. i wish i could find something to say that something's worth all these bad memories to be kept, but i cant. all these people dont help me in any way to be closer to God. neither do they help me in any other way. they are practically bad influences. and i can see it. sigh.

what really happens when i lose my memory? i dont know. i actually hope i can. just let my memory start from 19april2009 again. if given a choice to start all over again, i would. i would go to jc. i would have spent more time with my mg friends then. sigh.

ahwells. life sucks. i miss my freedom.

oh. and how i hate it when i'm expected to reply people fast, because people just think that i check my phone often. that's just really lame. just fyi, i check my phone because i have nothing to say. so very obviously, when i'm with my mg friends, i dont check my phone. and it's proven with my battery life. grrr.