there will always be a stain there. you may say that nothing in the world is perfect, but the stain there is really difficult to wipe off. i wish it was just like a drawing in pencil that i could just erase it off. but NO! i cant do that. even if i've erased it, traces would be left behind.

BECAUSE I CRY.
i really need you
to tell me who i am.

probably, you may send me to some places with no tv, no aircon, nothing at all.
you say COUNT YOUR BLESSING.
i'm glad you can tell that i'm the oldest.
born with such responsibilities.
i cant choose it. i dont want it.

maybe i will just die tomorrow. and i will have no regrets.
i'm not doing anything to torture myself.
dying aint really a big deal.
everyone will die.

NG LI PIN! that's precisely why you should just GET OVER IT! everyone will die. what is your problem?!

probably YOU are just backstabbing me right now.
and you dont think i know it. i have nothing to say.
there are reasons why i cant trust you.
i hope you know why.
yes, it's YOU.

i really cant trust someone i cant see through.
that's probably why i cant seem to tell you anything?
i cant seem to get to talk to you properly.
or it's just this wall in between that will never drop.

i admit that i'm naive. i admit that i'm shallow. i admit that i'm straight forward. i admit i'm not good with words. i admit that i have terrible mood swings (that i dont even notice). i admit that i dont trust 90% of you. I JUST HAVE TO ADMIT WHATEVER YOU SAY. not like it's the first time i'm doing this, right? just have the wrong impression of me, i dont care!

get the full story right before you jump into conclusions like that. dont always just think that it's MY fault. i hate it when you say that it's MY FAULT when i may be at fault, but someone else bears a bigger responsibility. DO NOT TAKE SIDES if you dont know the full story.

the mask fades after a long time.